Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Location: Elwynn Forest
Being a Gnome, everyone thinks I'm ugly and constantly make short jokes and crack at me about how 'squishy' I am. I'm not tall like Kalelier, I don't have endearing facial hair like Thalonious and I don't even have breast like Tryxx. So whenever people are drunk and flirting in the forests of Elwynn or taverns of Menethil Harbor, no one even gives me a second glance.
But I'm a Gnome dammit, and I have my needs. AND I'm desperate. And sometimes desperate measures need to be taken. I need to get lucky too. The key to that is a little trade secret I have: Get 'em Drunk!
This is a Satyyr I met during one of my quests. He was so stressed out that I managed to 'convince' him that he needed a little....servicing.
Speaking of servicing, after Thal and that nympho night elf retired to their rooms, I found Mr. Confident Night Elf-guy drunk out of his mind in the tub again. I didn't have to do much work.
I had to wait for this looter to die before I could get any action....uh....did I say die? I meant 'sleep'. It was consentual, trust me.
So the moral of the story here is that when you're short and unnattractive, sometimes you have to do the dispiccable just to maintain your sanity. God my sex life sucks.
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